Jollibee bails out Woodside
Showing posts with label Woodside. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Woodside. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Liveblogging Deli Meeting
Will: What's your problem, Jordan? What do you want to change? I know you're sensitive about fat jokes, for obvious reasons. Bateman's Andy Reid post was offensive, yes, but it had buzz, and that's exactly what we need right now.
Jordan: We need to establish a mission. No liveblogging meetings.
Will: Fair.
Jordan: No pointless stories.
Will: Pointless stories? Like AJ's story about the guy on the subway eating the thing?
Jordan: That was fine.
Bateman: Why don't you like my fat jokes?
Will: He got us buzz.
Jordan: Yeah he got buzzed.
Jerry: Everyone in the media is fat.
Will: What do you know about the media?
Bateman: Have you ever even been to Manhattan?
Will: You are uneducated, and I only want educated people to speak at this meeting. Jordan, you went to an Ivy League institution, and you must have something to say. Name posts you don't like.
Jerry: All of them!
Will: Not talking to you.
Bateman: I'm posting right now, you can look at it afterwards.
Will: Slam the (New York) Post. It's time to slam them. Jordan, I'm upset you won't be with us for the media war. I think I know what you mean, you like the jokes and the non sensical stuff more then the straight bloggy shit.
Jordan: I like what makes it unique, anyone can write stories, or talk about stuff. But we have skills. We can do Craig's List plants or uh, yknow, we can have concepts.
Will: I'm with you on that I think our best posts have been conceptual ones, even a picture is funny.
Jordan: Re-contextualizing.
Jerry: What you're describing is the opposition.
Will: We're conceptualizing it! Remember Gutenberg? He invented the printing press.
Jerry: Not the internet!
Jordan: I thought Gutenberg was the place where it was invented.
Bateman: Shut up! What's wrong with my posts?
Jordan: You think its funny because it's fat people.
Tape gets fuzzy, fades out.
Jordan: We need to establish a mission. No liveblogging meetings.
Will: Fair.
Jordan: No pointless stories.
Will: Pointless stories? Like AJ's story about the guy on the subway eating the thing?
Jordan: That was fine.
Bateman: Why don't you like my fat jokes?
Will: He got us buzz.
Jordan: Yeah he got buzzed.
Jerry: Everyone in the media is fat.
Will: What do you know about the media?
Bateman: Have you ever even been to Manhattan?
Will: You are uneducated, and I only want educated people to speak at this meeting. Jordan, you went to an Ivy League institution, and you must have something to say. Name posts you don't like.
Jerry: All of them!
Will: Not talking to you.
Bateman: I'm posting right now, you can look at it afterwards.
Will: Slam the (New York) Post. It's time to slam them. Jordan, I'm upset you won't be with us for the media war. I think I know what you mean, you like the jokes and the non sensical stuff more then the straight bloggy shit.
Jordan: I like what makes it unique, anyone can write stories, or talk about stuff. But we have skills. We can do Craig's List plants or uh, yknow, we can have concepts.
Will: I'm with you on that I think our best posts have been conceptual ones, even a picture is funny.
Jordan: Re-contextualizing.
Jerry: What you're describing is the opposition.
Will: We're conceptualizing it! Remember Gutenberg? He invented the printing press.
Jerry: Not the internet!
Jordan: I thought Gutenberg was the place where it was invented.
Bateman: Shut up! What's wrong with my posts?
Jordan: You think its funny because it's fat people.
Tape gets fuzzy, fades out.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
MY SRI PAH PHAI LEFTOVERS JUST DEMANDED AN EMERGENCY BAIL OUT FROM MY ASS
and all i got was this lousy post.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
What are you eating, bro?
Tonight, I left work a normal man. I humbly waited for the the V train to come take me home. After one F train that I missed, it came. I boarded the vessel as myself. It was a long day, so after finding a seat, I nodded off, enjoying the comforts of an outer borough bound train.
Things were going okay, for a while, I had one of those three seaters, sharing it with some rando with a sick jacket. We're rolling up to Queens Plaza and I'm just enjoying my seat when I hear "excuse me", as some frizzled ass Mexican dude squeezes between me and Johnny rando to my right. Johnny immediatelty, I mean like without thinking about it gets up, and leaves me with this dude. I was freaked out for two seconds until I realized that this guy was on some other shit.
He takes out some European style soda can, but homie was not quenching his thirst. He poured out something that resembled loose tobacco, but with some interesting looking gold flakes in it. He daintilly pulled out all of the gold flakes which was amazing and was more amazing when I looked around and saw everyone on our half of the train car was looking at homeboy, wondering what was up his sleeve.
Eventually he got all of the gold flakes out of his quote unquote tobacco that he didn't want before reaching back into his satchel to retrieve a pouch which he unfolded even more daintily then he picked the "gold" flakes out of the "tobacco." Once he finally opened the pouch it revealed beautiful, large green leafs.
As if he could read the surprise/confusion of his fellow riders of the V train, he put the leaf in his mouth to hold it, and reached back into his satchel, this time to pull out a green tupperware, with no writing on it. He carefully scooped the tupperware until a small white solid liquid reluctantly came out.
He spread the white lotion on the leaf, with so much care. Keep in mind he was still sitting right next to me, despite the fact that many people were staring at him and the guy sitting next to him had long ago gotten up.
After sufficiently spreading the mystery cream, he carefully poured the tobacco looking powder onto the lotion covered leaf. Once it was thoroughly deposited on the lotion covered leaf he folded it once, then folded it again, then folded it again, then put it in his mouth and chewed. Hard.
It was at this point the V train reached 65th street. I went home and hung out with Will and then we went out with Jamie and Jason before going to every bar between 54th and 62nd Street. I told them what happened. Jamie encouraged me to get a hot tequila at the taco stand and we played some forty year old guys in pool.
Things were going okay, for a while, I had one of those three seaters, sharing it with some rando with a sick jacket. We're rolling up to Queens Plaza and I'm just enjoying my seat when I hear "excuse me", as some frizzled ass Mexican dude squeezes between me and Johnny rando to my right. Johnny immediatelty, I mean like without thinking about it gets up, and leaves me with this dude. I was freaked out for two seconds until I realized that this guy was on some other shit.
He takes out some European style soda can, but homie was not quenching his thirst. He poured out something that resembled loose tobacco, but with some interesting looking gold flakes in it. He daintilly pulled out all of the gold flakes which was amazing and was more amazing when I looked around and saw everyone on our half of the train car was looking at homeboy, wondering what was up his sleeve.
Eventually he got all of the gold flakes out of his quote unquote tobacco that he didn't want before reaching back into his satchel to retrieve a pouch which he unfolded even more daintily then he picked the "gold" flakes out of the "tobacco." Once he finally opened the pouch it revealed beautiful, large green leafs.
As if he could read the surprise/confusion of his fellow riders of the V train, he put the leaf in his mouth to hold it, and reached back into his satchel, this time to pull out a green tupperware, with no writing on it. He carefully scooped the tupperware until a small white solid liquid reluctantly came out.
He spread the white lotion on the leaf, with so much care. Keep in mind he was still sitting right next to me, despite the fact that many people were staring at him and the guy sitting next to him had long ago gotten up.
After sufficiently spreading the mystery cream, he carefully poured the tobacco looking powder onto the lotion covered leaf. Once it was thoroughly deposited on the lotion covered leaf he folded it once, then folded it again, then folded it again, then put it in his mouth and chewed. Hard.
It was at this point the V train reached 65th street. I went home and hung out with Will and then we went out with Jamie and Jason before going to every bar between 54th and 62nd Street. I told them what happened. Jamie encouraged me to get a hot tequila at the taco stand and we played some forty year old guys in pool.
Friday, December 5, 2008
Father Stephan Orders a Sandwich (part 1)
Thirty Five thousand dollars later
We were basking in the Ultra Violet Rays of a Miami Olive Loaf
Off the Grand Central Expressway
Jerry sold a Hardboiled Egg,
cleanly and efficiently
eliminating the overhead
Thanks to Gil for the dough
And Steve for the advice:
Stay away from those salty meats, My Friend
We bought drank the profits away before the first business quarter was up.
It was a blast.
Bateman kept the Horny Goat Weed from our counter-display
We were basking in the Ultra Violet Rays of a Miami Olive Loaf
Off the Grand Central Expressway
Jerry sold a Hardboiled Egg,
cleanly and efficiently
eliminating the overhead
Thanks to Gil for the dough
And Steve for the advice:
Stay away from those salty meats, My Friend
We bought drank the profits away before the first business quarter was up.
It was a blast.
Bateman kept the Horny Goat Weed from our counter-display
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